Here's something interesting. Somebody recently approached me and said, "I read your blog the other day. It made me depressed." I laughed. Somebody else asked me why I wrote online. Why I didn't just keep a journal. With my overinflated ego, I responded like this, "I'm half-convinced that everything I write is somehow important. That at least one of my thoughts will hit somebody and change them for the better. Or for the worse. But that it will change them nonetheless." So I thought that now would be a good time to revisit my reasons for keeping this blog.
I haven't censored anything. I've changed names and used pseudonyms and whatnot, but I have not censored anything. I write everything stream of consciousness style and I do not edit. Well, I edited once, but that's because I was being incredibly cruel and I thought it would be prudent to delete that vicious insult. But I write that way and in such a public forum so that I can watch myself evolve. Or so I can watch myself stagnate. Either one works. It's like a living record of who I am, who I am becoming, and who I was. It's a holocron (If anybody can tell me what that term is from... I don't know what I'll do, but I'll give you something.).
And in a part of my mind, a part that has considerably less spiderwebs than everywhere else, I do believe that what I write does change people. If it changes how they see me, or how they see the world, it is change nonetheless. So even if this does become depressing at times, I'll still persevere. So there. That is why. And I haven't checked, but I think my reasons for writing this blog may have changed since my first post.
From (Obviously),
Daisuke
